Orienting Cairns

Putting ourselves out there is always an act of courage. 
When we open ourselves up to engaging with another person, there is no way to be absolutely certain how the interaction will go.

There are many factors that influence any interaction. When we step into the energetic field of any other, all parties bring in all of the life experiences we have each had leading up to that moment. We may or may not speak one another’s  language, both metaphorically and literally. We are subject to all of the sensory input of the the environment we are meeting in: is it quiet or loud?  is it bright or dark? is it chaotic or serene? Do we have spacious time, or are we pressed and rushed - so on and so on.  

While any number of these factors may be beyond our control at any given time, the one that we can control is how we show up.

You might push back on me for that one. We all have out triggers, challenges, gut reactions, and limits. While I don't disagree with you, as always there is more nuance to uncover. 

This image reminds us that if we spend the time and attention in our everyday life “stacking the rocks” or “cairns” of our nervous system with intention; if we commit to understanding how the magnetic pull of our internal compass influences us, we can choose instead to truly respond rather than react. We can build trust, adn consent, with ourselves. 
Many folks who avoid opening interactions with others share that it is - at least in partcc- because we do not “trust” other people. Many times what is most true is that we do not fully trust ourselves. Do we trust ourselves to be able to say no? To be able to end an interaction when we are done with it? To be able to hold our center and express our truth with clarity? To be able to sit within our own awkwardness and let that be not only OK, but potentially a celebrated point of connection! When we put ourselves out there  and greet other beings, we do become a “target” for their attention. This attention can come at us in a myriad of ways. Do we trust ourselves to be able to surf the waves of whatever come with relative balance?
Don’t worry! Trust is NOT binary. If you said no to any of these things you may trust yourself in many other ways.

If this card has come to you today, it is asking you to assess if you have put the time and energy into building your stacked, balanced center. It is a reminder that while there is risk in opening to the energy of others, there is also the potential for great reward in diversity of thought and experience. Relationships with others allow us to learn about facets of ourselves we can never see in a solitary vacuum, and there is incredible opportunity to grow when we have taken the time to solidify and stay balanced within our own center. 

Sometimes, even when we have balanced the stones of our nervous system, they are unexpectedly toppled by a new person, event or situation. Fear not! I invite you to take a deep breath, incorporate what you have learned, and re-balance. Some of the greatest cities have had to rebuild - stronger, safer and wiser - rocked by earthquakes that were not accounted for.